Whether we realise that or not — we always stick to our priorities.
The issue is that our actual priorities aren’t always the same as the declared ones. We might blame constant distractions or circumstances. However, if we’re honest with ourselves, we might remember a few occasions when we wanted something so badly that no power on Earth would sidetrack us.
We don’t live in a vacuum. Something will always tempt us to change a course of action — something fun, a lack of motivation, lost focus, fatigue, or sudden demands of the external world. Life constantly brings potential alternatives. The only way is to anticipate and account for what might arise.
Find out WHAT MATTERS.
It’s also important to remember that we have fundamental needs — driven by our animal instincts — to satisfy. Until these are fulfilled, we’ll struggle to climb further on that hierarchy of needs. It might be tricky to come up with accurate calculations for a proposed skyscraper if you haven’t slept for three days.
Equally, we have psychological and social demands. When we have deficiencies within those areas, our unconscious might consider those a higher priority if they trigger our feelings stronger than the goals addressing other areas of our lives we’re setting on a conscious level.
For example, consider a person who’s highly dependent on appreciation. Guess what they’d be more tempted to do when they have a choice: attend a birthday party because there’s ‘no party without them’ or compile a report that ‘could be done later’?
It all depends on what will make them experience more fulfilment. Even if they are flattered by a compliment from that birthday person yet dependent on their boss’ praise — they’ll stick to that report on a Saturday night. Yet, a person might be tempted to accept the invitation if there’s a higher potential for external validation at the social gathering and the job is perceived only as a mundane routine. Of course, life is far more complex than that; our decisions are multifaceted, responding to a myriad of needs and contexts.
It’s the same story with limiting beliefs. Let’s say, deep inside, you believe that money is evil. Regardless of what you do, until you address that belief, your wealth-related aspirations might struggle to materialise.
And until we discover our true calling — our unconscious will support our primal instincts to ensure we’re safe and satisfied, even if that means a mediocre existence that costs us the life of our dreams.
Turn into a FANATIC of what you do. And if you are not — change what you do.
Unless you find that you eat, think, and breathe your project, ask yourself why bother doing it.
It’s ok not to be excited about something all the time. You might be puzzled about the project or occupied with something else. However, it’s a different story when it starts to resemble a daunting task — a job you’ve got to do to make a living. Or, according to someone, a ‘great living.’
When you’re really into something, then even when you rest, ideas tend to pop into your head. You start spotting clues to solutions everywhere you go.
It’s down to every one of us whether to invest our lifetime in something that’ll help us survive or will make us thrive.
Remember, there are multiple ways to make your living, but there are just a few that’ll make you truly tick. These might be more demanding in the early days, yet they tend to bring more fulfilment and far superior results in the long term.
Stop trying to be a GOOD GIRL or GOOD BOY. Master the art of saying NO.
Back at school, some people turned into good-grade addicts. Eventually, they put the equals sign between a mark and their self-worth, to the point where ‘marks’ became metrics of self-validation.
Sometimes, we chase that feeling of appreciation through a ‘good girl’ or a ‘good boy’ attitude. Not only is this not always possible or necessary, but it also prevents our growth because we start getting concerned with how we’re being perceived rather than how to accomplish our goal and what to do to get there.
If you recognise yourself here, remember that you don’t owe anything to anyone. Well, apart from your creditors. To take care of them, prioritise your outcomes.
PRIORITISE, yet allow space for DEVIATIONS.
Right things at the right time
Stick to your vision and routine. That’ll keep you aligned with your priorities and help discipline.
Start with the most important stuff — in case you need more time to focus on that task, or there’s something you didn’t anticipate. Not to mention, these provide the most significant impact on the overall progress of your project.
Don’t do anything irrelevant. And don’t do anything relevant at the wrong time. Don’t read productivity blogs or books during working hours, especially if you’re working for yourself.
Rest when you’re tired. And party when you’ve accomplished a milestone. If you keep kicking a donkey without feeding, don’t complain it’s stubborn when it croaks. If you don’t allow yourself sufficient rest — your body will take it. Seemingly at the random time, though in reality, when it had enough of your ignorance. Just remember a situation when you suddenly fell sick; that was the last thing you needed. The same goes for rewards; if you don’t celebrate your achievements, don’t get surprised when your motivation starts fading.
Taking care of your Working Environment
Some people claim that they can’t function in a mess. That’s a proven fact. So, move the mess to the side beyond your sight. Yet don’t touch it during your working hours. You can do that in the evening or during the weekend. Avoiding the work doesn’t bring results quicker.
It does create an illusion of accomplishment. Yet, no illusion will pay your bill.
I had a friend who’d been looking for a project for a while. He kept looking and looking, meanwhile browsing Facebook, answering his phone promptly whenever it rang, and being there whenever any of his friends or acquaintances needed him. His place was sparkling clean, but eventually, he moved to a cheaper one he could afford, having no steady income for several months.
Move rubbish aside, don’t prioritise it — unless you’re a cleaner or had a lifelong dream to become one. All things chorus should be dealt with promptly and meanwhile.
Sudden demands
Stop people-pleasing. Stop self-pleasing. When something seemingly important pops up — don’t just drop everything. Jot that task within your tasks log, and during your allocated planning time, decide whether it needs to be addressed and, if so, when to handle it.
If it’s genuinely urgent, deal with it right after you complete what you’re already dealing with.
Some situations, such as medical emergencies or urgent family matters, demand immediate attention. To accommodate unforeseen events, it’s wise to book not more than 75% of your time. This buffer allows flexibility. Even without emergencies, tasks may take longer or require additional activities.
Beware, your brain is a LAZY MONKEY.
Whenever you’re short of motivation, step inside that vision of your overarching accomplishment we discussed here.
Imagine that you’re inside that picture. Notice what you see and hear the moment you accomplish your goal. Observe what you feel as a result. Enjoy that feeling for a moment. And the moment you do so, jump out of that vision and start doing things immediately.
Don’t ‘sit’ there for long, enjoying the taste of your success. Remember, it’s just a mere hallucination at this stage.
There’s a part of your brain that constantly seeks shortcuts. The moment it sniffs, you’re pleased — it goes: ‘I’m done here; you seem satisfied. What else do you want me to do? Work? What for? Save energy.’
Don’t fall into that trap. That’s why so many great dreams remain great dreams only. The bridge between fantasy and reality is the action.
The moment you feel a boost of inspiration, do something related to your project. That’ll establish the right connections in your brain between the vision and actions required to achieve that vision.
Conclusion
Our priorities shape our lives, whether consciously or unconsciously. To align our actions with our true goals, it is essential to recognise and address our fundamental needs and psychological demands. We can achieve greater fulfilment and success by identifying what truly matters and becoming passionate about our pursuits.
It is also crucial to master the art of saying no to distractions and unnecessary tasks, prioritising what brings the most significant impact. Additionally, maintaining a conducive working environment while being flexible in the face of sudden demands is vital.
Finally, overcoming our brain’s inclination for shortcuts requires us to link our vision to actionable steps. By doing so we transform our dreams into reality, bridging the gap between fantasy and accomplishment.
