After spending a weekend with a few of my highly successful friends and their families, I couldn’t help but notice they all had something in common: their mindset, behaviour, and overall approach to life. Their attitude towards money was also notably different from that of my less financially established friends, most of whom were predominantly single.
I wondered whether this was a coincidence or if some people knew secrets that others didn’t. Or, a thought crossed my mind: maybe money, like people, is attracted to those who are more handsome and pretty? I brushed that nonsense away. “Everyone is beautiful if you look long enough,” said one of my friends once. Frankly, most of my single friends were still young and attractive. Perhaps, I thought, background played a role. However, I had friends who achieved impressive success through sheer determination and effort.
Yet, why did some have everything while others struggled despite their hard work? And that seemed to be the case applicable to far more people than only those within my friends circles.
Drawing some parallels, I figured there was something in common! Patterns.
When Money and Dates Run Away
Firstly, money like to be with someone desirable, independent, self-sufficient, yet popular. As it’s typical for extroverts, money like to be amongst others. And so when you run after them in a way declaring that you have none — they woosh away. Why stay around if others don’t want you? It’s easier to swap right with someone else than take chances. Money are intelligent creatures with a strong self-preservation instinct.
If you’re too keen, almost desperate:
- You believe they’ll change your life overnight or make you happier;
- You settle for less unwilling to put effort to meet or be an equal match for money of a higher standard;
- You want babies before you even make it to bed. What if you’re not even compatible?
If you’re not interested in them:
- You have no appreciation for them;
- You’re flaky and not loyal.
If you don’t care of them:
- You treat them poorly and let them go quickly;
- You don’t protect them;
- You leave them at random places.
If you don’t respect them:
- You talk badly about them;
- You believe they’re evil;
- You’re not proud of them.
If you show no class, following bad advice:
- You’re too demanding, never having enough;
- You play hard to get;
- You’re never available;
- You put no effort;
- You’re always late;
- You don’t show your affection;
- You’re inappreciative.
If you’re obsessively possessive:
- You don’t give them any freedom;
- You don’t let them go out and have fun or grow.
“Relationships are like a butterfly — beautiful on an open hand. Close your fist tight, and you kill it.
Reasons for Short-lived Relationships
- You take them too seriously too soon, while they want to take it easier, have fun and enjoy their time with you, as well as life in general.
- You’re too concerned with the clock ticking, desperate to reach your goal, meanwhile forgetting that the process itself could be highly satisfying.
- You’re struggling to commit, hopping from one money source to another, fearful of accepting responsibility.
- You’re too easy, and they don’t need to put an effort into winning you because you run after them at every opportunity, forgetting about the law of abundance.
- You work too much, and you’re a boring company. You never go out and never mingle with others to unwind, get inspired, circulate, or grow.
- You’re in a constant hurry, making no time to enjoy each other.
Making Money Want to Stay with You
Speak the same language:
- Learn their language before trying to articulate your wishes.
- Familiarise yourself with their interests so you’re of interest to them too.
- Take good care of them.
Be clear what you want:
- Don’t get carried away with every attractive money. There are many of them, and all are pretty awesome, as long as you find the right one for you.
- Know what you want, when, why and how.
- Avoid the temptation of over-night jackpots if you’re in for a long-term gain.
- Discover your compatibilities early on. Don’t fall blindly after projecting your dreams on them. They’ll fail your expectations.
Say No when something doesn’t suit you:
- Never compromise your authenticity and values.
- Don’t suffer for the sake of relationships — that’ll only lead to decreased self-respect.
- Respect each other’s boundaries.
Don’t put them on a pedestal — they aren’t Gods:
- Say No to ego and perfectionism. Take yourself and them easy. Yet, say Yes to self-respect and fulfilment.
- Don’t dissolve in them, or they’ll lose interest in you.
- Have other interests in your life.
- It’s okay not to want to do everything for them. Doing so will turn them on and make them want you more.
Follow good practice:
- Don’t spend time indoors constantly working. Go out, have fun, and meet new money.
- Have fun together.
- Replace demands with appreciation.
- Avoid being high maintenance.
Stop treating them as if they owe you anything:
- Don’t blame them for all your misfortunes.
- Don’t project your childhood dreams or other Cinderella-like stories on them; let them surprise you.
- Don’t make them responsible for your past traumas or disappointments from past relationships.
Remember, Love is everything, BUT…
- Treat them well as new money, appreciating they’ve chosen to be around you.
- Yet, don’t love them more than yourself. Put a mask on your face first: Before you give love to anyone, you should experience it thoroughly first.
- Respect their interests. Yet don’t forget yours.
- Set clear boundaries.
- Prioritise your health to avoid catching anything while getting carried away with love-making.
As a friend of mine says about the dating arena: ‘You fall in love with them until you’ve met.’
Many people fall blindly for the idea of money. Yet when the two meet, introduced by a great opportunity, some people become disappointed, seeing that their expectations aren’t quite met. The money aren’t suddenly as easy-going. And, to our surprise, they expect us to make an effort, too.
And finally, if you wish to find your RIGHT Source of MONEY for lasting harmonious relationships, maintain your independence, and don’t cling to them. Not only does it make you stronger, but it also makes you more attractive.
If worse comes to worst, get over the breakup quickly. Remember, one leaves for a better one to follow. Don’t occupy a vacant spot with sorrows.
